Sometimes I’m bewildered by what gets the media going.
First of all, Microsoft buys Skype for $8 billion. Everyone knows it’s not worth that much. Surely nobody thinks Microsoft can do anything useful (or useable) with the technology? They lost their software Mojo a long time ago. When did they last come up with a new product that made them money – apart from Windows and Office, they’ve got nothin’. They’ll take Skype and stick it in Office and on the X Box, and people will curse them to eternity every time they try to use it, and it won’t work, and it would have been quicker to build a car and then get in the car and then drive to the fucking meeting instead of setting up a videoconference with it.
Then all the tech/games pages are going apeshit about this new game based around the hardboiled detective genre. LA Noire (sic). I’ve watched the trailer on YouTube, and what I’m not seeing is anything that looks remotely “realistic” as some reviewers claim. They look like the same, shit, woodentop 3D models you see in all these games, from The Sims on down. They don’t look like people and they don’t move like people, and whoever does them really can’t do faces. Or hands. And then the game itself just looks like work. That’s something I’ll never get.
Finally, Pippa Fucking Middleton. Here’s a clue: she’s not all that. She has a strangely creased-looking face, a flat arse, and white “rich people” teeth. She may be okay for a rich bird, but she’s not all that, not really. I can’t fathom why all these people were masturbating about her walking up the aisle on the recent Toff‘s Bank Holiday. Okay yar. It reminds me of all the gushing about old potato head: Lady Di with her bowlhead haircut, chunky thighs and crooked nose. Yeah, she was really hot.